Wednesday, March 24, 2010

To Lose or Not to Lose?

Well this is certainly not a problem I ever thought I would have to deal with. I've just known that I will always be someone who has weight to lose; thus I should always being actively trying to lose weight. Here's the dilema:

Saturday, I found it! The dress. The one I could see myself getting married in. I had so been dreading wedding dress shopping. Being a size 16, if I have to try on a size bigger, I'm in the plus size department. And wedding dresses run on the small side. I had convinced myself I was going to have to custom order a hideous dress, not at all what I was looking for, because of my size. There just isn't a great selection of plus size wedding dresses. And I was looking to keep the budget down.

Wedding dresses hanging on a rack
So, Saturday, I met with a bridal consultant. I ticked off my fingers all the things I was looking for in a dress, but assured her I was open to trying anything. I was just saying, I've been in this body for 24 years and I know what works and what doesn't. As for the list: preferably not strapless, I need something to support my DD's, and hopefully even thick straps because I have such broad shoulders, something simple, but not too plain, something for an outdoor setting, white, yes, but the shade isn't too important. She asks me my size and pulls me over to the rack holding the potential candidates. She then asks if a halter is okay, and I replied, that's great.

(Note: My dress is not pictured.)

She's pulls a dress off the rack. I consider it from all angles. I liked it. I wasn't sure about the long train, or if the bead work was just right, but it looked good overall. The consultant hung it in the dressing room while I browsed the racks. I pull about nine other dresses. Everything looked good, but I point I wasn't really loving any one more than the other. I was waiting to try them on before I made my decision. As I said, I was trying to stay open to anything.

I fly through dress after dress. No, that didn't work at all. My boobs would never fit in any size of that dress. That neckline to too straight. With the lace bottom, they would have to custom order that one. This one looks pink. This one makes me look fat(ter). I like this top, but not the bottom. I like this bottom, but not the top. This one is two sizes to small, I like it, but I don't know what it would look like if I ordered it, don't want to take any chances. Finally, one that zips. But it's a size 18 and is an absolute tent on me. I look like I should be housing the tables at the reception not walking down the aisle. Okay, clip it back, what would it look like smaller? It would be okay. There's beading at the bottom though, hemming the dress would be nightmare and an expensive one at that.

We get to the last dress on the rack. The ivory halter that we pulled first. I shimmy in and it zips! I can't believe it, it fits. And it had all the elements I was looking for. It looks like it was custom made for me. The waist cuts in, slimming my shape. The beading tapers off into a V and hits in exactly the right spots. There isn't any beading on the bottom, making hemming a cinch! The halter straps need to be shortened, but other than that, it fits just like a glove. I was shocked at such a good find. And it was on sale. And the floor model was clean and in good shape. I took it, receiving another 20% off.

After 1 hour and 20 minutes, I walked out of the shop with a dress in hand, and it fit the budget coming in at $500 with tax. The dilema in that you ask? As I said, it fits like a glove.

As you probably know, I've been trying to lose weight. I hoped that I could lose at least 20 pounds before the wedding. With about five months to go, that was a reasonable goal. The thing is, my weight loss has slowed (and I've gotten lazy truthfully). I decided, I didn't need the stress of trying to lose a bunch of weight before the wedding. It didn't want to starve myself to be sure I could fit in a smaller size dress.

But I think I could lose a little weight and still fit in the dress. (I mean to be healthy, I really do need to lose weight.) But I'm worried if I lose too much, there won't be time to get all the alterations done on the dress. They scolded me while I was there, you can't buy a dress and then lose a bunch of weight. Okay. Point taken. Maybe 10 pounds max? Does anybody have any idea how much would be too much? How many pounds is a size typically? Then I worry if I don't actively try to lose weight, I'm going to gain weight, and then I won't fit either. Why does everything wedding related have to be so stressful? Help!


alexis said...

hey! thanks for the comment, it was hilarious...YOU are hilarious. I almost died when i was reading your post about the slimmer -- i totally get you, girl. i only pull my spanx out for special occasions, otherwise i'd spend all my life feeling like a processed meat.
p.s. the boob post is now live. :)

alexis said...

oh, and about the wedding dress dilemma...for your height, i'd say ten pounds might actually take off a size, or at least half a size. if i were you, i'd just try to maintain your current figure with weight lifting and some cardio, but not hit the crash dieting or anything crazy like that.

mel said...

i say if you want to do it, do it. don't do it or not because you're worried about what a dress will look like.
i was a bridesmaid 2 years ago and we ordered the dresses nearly a year in advance. by the time of the wedding, i had lost 35 pounds. i found a good seamstress and she made it work!
if you loose a lot of weight, then go out and get a different dress, sell the other one on ebay, get it altered, or buy a new one from the rack.
the logic of the dress can be worked with - do what you need to do to feel fabulous about yourself!

MommyLovesStilettos said...

I say do what makes you happy. IF you want to lose 10 lbs DO IT. The dress will look fab no matter what :)

McVal said...

The dress will still look good after 10 lbs. Maybe you'll lose it in your arms or legs first!!!

Melanie said...

Congratulations! Your mom showed us a pic of your dress and you are stunning in it! It really does looke like it was made for you.

I say start with trying to lose five pounds and then try the dress on. If it still fits nice enough, go for another five. Just be careful, because I agree with Alexis, 10 pounds might be much for your height.

Anonymous said...

You will be amazed at what a good seamstress can do to a wedding dress. Mine was gigantic on me, lace and beading everywhere, and by the time they were done it fit like a glove and you couldn't tell that it had been altered at all.

Irresistible♥Icing said...

I can totally relate to everything you said here! I have been putting off trying on a dress for those reasons!!! Ahhh!!!

Soo happy to hear you found the "one!" That is sooooo exciting!!!!

Lisa said...

I think weight loss and wedding planning in the same time frame is insanity. Love you where you are at right now and look good doing it in the perfect dress. 5 months later you can go all gung ho to lose the weight. Just be thoughtful of what you are eating...don't gain weight, but don't stress about that 20 lbs. I bet you will just glow on your special day. :)

Just Lisa said...

Will you have fittings? You could still lose a little weight and the dress could be altered. It's a lot easier to take a dress in than take it out!

I came by to welcome you to SITS! We're happy to have you with us!

Shell said...

Oh, wedding dress shopping, such fun! Though why they make wedding dresses to run small, I'll never know. I would think that you could probably lose 10 pounds and have it still fit. :)

Stopping in to welcome you to SITS!

Just One Week said...

So exciting when you find THE dress! Yay! Alterations are not that difficult or time consuming. I had a pricey dress that continuously had to be taken in until the week of the wedding - not a problem at all.

In situations like these, I try to think - what is the absolute, worst case scenario. What is it... it is that you gain weight and dresses are very difficult to take out. That being said, you should continue to work out and you should continue to try to lose as much weight as you want. Your dress can be taken in if need be, and that way you don't need to worry about gaining weight.

Congrats! Stopping by from SITS!

Persis Shah said...

congratulations girl!! you just accomplished the single biggest issue that drives most women crazy when they get married...its all smooth sailing from here on!

would love to see a pic of your dress =)